Shabbat at Home

SHabbat at home- awkward as usual. Will and Aarthi came over Friday night, and shortly thereafter they and Em set off for a restaurant, leaving me home feeling a bit blue. So I davened and then read and talked to my folks for a while. We had a pretty low key dinner:kasha, fruit salad, tossed salad. I didn't see the point of making dinner the night after Thanksgiving. From tehre the nigh shaped up: I hung out with the Will, Aarthi and Em when they returned, although I felt occasionally out of place. But it was a pleasant night, even if the whole watching of Internet cartoons that went on made me antsy: so darn out of Shabbos-mode. Not only is it really not halakhically ok (I bend that enough at home, or even at school to small degrees, but Shalom Bayit is my major priority) it just doesn't feel right. But such is life. Sometimes I think I should draw more clear lines, and in more strict places, but it really doesn't work so well with my folks for now. In general, I'm happy with my choices. But, as with everything, there are momentary regrets. It helped that later on, after Aarthi left and Em went to talk on the phone with Josh 9her boyfriend), Will and I talked for a bit, and he apologized for making me feel lonely/out of place. Not that there was anything he should have done, but- knowing that he noticed helped, a lot. Not that I should imagine he wouldn't: he knows me far too well for that. (Silly side-note. At one point, we were hanging out on the living room floor, Em leaning on my lap and me leaning a bit on Will. So Aarthi observes that we look like a family- ok thus far. Then she follows up with: Emma's the baby, and Maya's the mom, and Will's the Dad. At which point we all go: no way. What feels much more real is my mom's observation that: "I have all my kids here", when we were sitting around with the parents.)

And somehow one of the oddest things about being home: there's all this Space. I don't know what to do with it. I put something down, and then later realize it is all the way across the house. At school if I do that, I'll never find the thing again. Here- it's all my home. I'm not used to it. Of all silly, useless things to notice...

Shabbat at Home

SHabbat at home- awkward as usual. Will and Aarthi came over Friday night, and shortly thereafter they and Em set off for a restaurant, leaving me home feeling a bit blue. So I davened and then read and talked to my folks for a while. We had a pretty low key dinner:kasha, fruit salad, tossed salad. I didn't see the point of making dinner the night after Thanksgiving. From tehre the nigh shaped up: I hung out with the Will, Aarthi and Em when they returned, although I felt occasionally out of place. But it was a pleasant night, even if the whole watching of Internet cartoons that went on made me antsy: so darn out of Shabbos-mode. Not only is it really not halakhically ok (I bend that enough at home, or even at school to small degrees, but Shalom Bayit is my major priority) it just doesn't feel right. But such is life. Sometimes I think I should draw more clear lines, and in more strict places, but it really doesn't work so well with my folks for now. In general, I'm happy with my choices. But, as with everything, there are momentary regrets. It helped that later on, after Aarthi left and Em went to talk on the phone with Josh 9her boyfriend), Will and I talked for a bit, and he apologized for making me feel lonely/out of place. Not that there was anything he should have done, but- knowing that he noticed helped, a lot. Not that I should imagine he wouldn't: he knows me far too well for that. (Silly side-note. At one point, we were hanging out on the living room floor, Em leaning on my lap and me leaning a bit on Will. So Aarthi observes that we look like a family- ok thus far. Then she follows up with: Emma's the baby, and Maya's the mom, and Will's the Dad. At which point we all go: no way. What feels much more real is my mom's observation that: "I have all my kids here", when we were sitting around with the parents.)

And somehow one of the oddest things about being home: there's all this Space. I don't know what to do with it. I put something down, and then later realize it is all the way across the house. At school if I do that, I'll never find the thing again. Here- it's all my home. I'm not used to it. Of all silly, useless things to notice...

The thing I forgot

So, the big sort of emotional event of the day: the grandparents (maternal) came over, in theory for Em's birthday. Well, more than in theory, but: Em and Mom were shopping when they arrived and left before they left, so Dad and I spent a bunch of time with just us and them. The big shtick was that, after having a really nice conversation on Thanksgiving, Pop (my grandfather. My grandmas are Ami Nee [maternal] and Amie Roz, my grandfather is Pop Charlie, and my other one was Pop Mel) turned up the anti-religion stuff a notch: he came with an excerpt from a lecture about why science has no evidence of G-d and why religion is bad. So we listened, I noticed that the speaker knew tons about science, but only a popular knowledge of religion. I.e. I with my sporadic and random religious education found bunches of holes in his religious arguements. But htis sparked, of course, yet another discussion/argument between Pop and I. Luckily, I've gotten to the point where it no longer bothers me: it's been happening since 3rd grade. Still: it takes effort, especially knowing that neither of us will ever really have any effect. Still: I'd thought he'd mostly given up, lately. I'm tempted to send him some excerpts from the book I'm reading for my NEJS 5a paper though. Not that it would have any effect. SO I probably won't. At least not until winter break. I've got too much to do until then. A paper, a final, choreography, take home finals and another final... Argh. Ok, I can get through this, and then I will sleep. Lots.

The thing I forgot

So, the big sort of emotional event of the day: the grandparents (maternal) came over, in theory for Em's birthday. Well, more than in theory, but: Em and Mom were shopping when they arrived and left before they left, so Dad and I spent a bunch of time with just us and them. The big shtick was that, after having a really nice conversation on Thanksgiving, Pop (my grandfather. My grandmas are Ami Nee [maternal] and Amie Roz, my grandfather is Pop Charlie, and my other one was Pop Mel) turned up the anti-religion stuff a notch: he came with an excerpt from a lecture about why science has no evidence of G-d and why religion is bad. So we listened, I noticed that the speaker knew tons about science, but only a popular knowledge of religion. I.e. I with my sporadic and random religious education found bunches of holes in his religious arguements. But htis sparked, of course, yet another discussion/argument between Pop and I. Luckily, I've gotten to the point where it no longer bothers me: it's been happening since 3rd grade. Still: it takes effort, especially knowing that neither of us will ever really have any effect. Still: I'd thought he'd mostly given up, lately. I'm tempted to send him some excerpts from the book I'm reading for my NEJS 5a paper though. Not that it would have any effect. SO I probably won't. At least not until winter break. I've got too much to do until then. A paper, a final, choreography, take home finals and another final... Argh. Ok, I can get through this, and then I will sleep. Lots.

Return to school

Today was primarily taken up in the car, or working on my NEJS 5a paper, which is now approaching 6 1/2 of its 10ish pages. Considering that I started today with about half a page, this isn't so bad. Yes I put it off to the last minute, yes I try very hard not to do that, but it happens. Life goes on, as I say far too often. However, I've done about as much of that paper as I can stand doing right now, and as I have tomorrow to work as well, I'm going to go to bed soon. I should study for Hebrew- but I'm tired. Maybe I'm being lazy, I don't know. Or rather, I don't care. I took a walk with Dave and then hung out with him while he ate (also with his suitemates, one of whom is my Brass Ensemble stand partner: a rather strange experience), returned, and really didn't want to work on the paper any more, so- I finished page 6 and started page 7, and that will have to be good enough. I'm not dancing tomorrow, so I have the time, luckily. I'm tired, even though I shouldn't be, having gotten real-person-like quantities of sleep this weekend. I got spoiled, I guess. And as I have nothing too interesting to say here, I'm off to bed. Sorry for babbling

Return to school

Today was primarily taken up in the car, or working on my NEJS 5a paper, which is now approaching 6 1/2 of its 10ish pages. Considering that I started today with about half a page, this isn't so bad. Yes I put it off to the last minute, yes I try very hard not to do that, but it happens. Life goes on, as I say far too often. However, I've done about as much of that paper as I can stand doing right now, and as I have tomorrow to work as well, I'm going to go to bed soon. I should study for Hebrew- but I'm tired. Maybe I'm being lazy, I don't know. Or rather, I don't care. I took a walk with Dave and then hung out with him while he ate (also with his suitemates, one of whom is my Brass Ensemble stand partner: a rather strange experience), returned, and really didn't want to work on the paper any more, so- I finished page 6 and started page 7, and that will have to be good enough. I'm not dancing tomorrow, so I have the time, luckily. I'm tired, even though I shouldn't be, having gotten real-person-like quantities of sleep this weekend. I got spoiled, I guess. And as I have nothing too interesting to say here, I'm off to bed. Sorry for babbling