Not much actually happened

It was just another day on break. I did some sewing- got back on track with my perpetual quilt project, and made dinner (of the very low-key middle of the week variety), and spent some time with my parents. I also allowed Mom to teach me some of her bunch of new (and hence enthused over) exercises. Someday I'll maybe understand why she enthuses over things that feel and look so silly, but I have yet to do so.

In the meantime, I really wonder about how people perceive me. I feel something like a chameleon: like I'm trying to be whatever people want to see in me, or more accurately, that people see what they want to in me, whether or not I actually change anything about myself. It came up over the dirty joke issue with BORG rehearsals (those who minded assumed that I minded, those who didn't assumed I enjoyed it), and it's certainly come up in other situations. I don't intend to change my apparent personality, although I do try to modify some aspects of my behavior to fit the situation (e.g. I'm much more touchy at dancing than other situations, I try to keep my religious references to company that appreciates them, etc). But those are details- I thought.

Similarly, I've gotten a bunch of really lovely compliments of late. Some are about my self-presentation, and one was about my apparent lack of curiosity where it doesn't belong (thank you Steve)- but that is something that I tailor to my friends' needs. Those who want me to ask, I'll ask much more. I'm not sure if that was worked into that concept of me or not. The whole thing seems to reflect more what people see of themselves in me than what they really think of Me. Or maybe seeing aspects of yourself in someone is how you get to know them?

I found the rather amusing description of teenage hormones that I've occasionally talked about. Maybe I'll post it up here at some point when I've nothing else to do. Not sure if that's worthwhile or not. THe book it's in is pretty silly and tacky, although I enjoy it. The description is, I'm sure, as well. But with the amount of hormones that seems to fly around this tiem of year, and in college populations in general- maybe it would be a useful reminder? Also a poem coming once I clean it up (aka edit it).

Not much actually happened

It was just another day on break. I did some sewing- got back on track with my perpetual quilt project, and made dinner (of the very low-key middle of the week variety), and spent some time with my parents. I also allowed Mom to teach me some of her bunch of new (and hence enthused over) exercises. Someday I'll maybe understand why she enthuses over things that feel and look so silly, but I have yet to do so.

In the meantime, I really wonder about how people perceive me. I feel something like a chameleon: like I'm trying to be whatever people want to see in me, or more accurately, that people see what they want to in me, whether or not I actually change anything about myself. It came up over the dirty joke issue with BORG rehearsals (those who minded assumed that I minded, those who didn't assumed I enjoyed it), and it's certainly come up in other situations. I don't intend to change my apparent personality, although I do try to modify some aspects of my behavior to fit the situation (e.g. I'm much more touchy at dancing than other situations, I try to keep my religious references to company that appreciates them, etc). But those are details- I thought.

Similarly, I've gotten a bunch of really lovely compliments of late. Some are about my self-presentation, and one was about my apparent lack of curiosity where it doesn't belong (thank you Steve)- but that is something that I tailor to my friends' needs. Those who want me to ask, I'll ask much more. I'm not sure if that was worked into that concept of me or not. The whole thing seems to reflect more what people see of themselves in me than what they really think of Me. Or maybe seeing aspects of yourself in someone is how you get to know them?

I found the rather amusing description of teenage hormones that I've occasionally talked about. Maybe I'll post it up here at some point when I've nothing else to do. Not sure if that's worthwhile or not. THe book it's in is pretty silly and tacky, although I enjoy it. The description is, I'm sure, as well. But with the amount of hormones that seems to fly around this tiem of year, and in college populations in general- maybe it would be a useful reminder? Also a poem coming once I clean it up (aka edit it).