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Mazal Tov to the 5 couples I know, or know half of who got married today. (Most won't see this, but my goodness- 5 different couples whom I know in some capacity who all chose the same wedding date. It just seems rather amusing, in a sort of pointless way.)
Considering the above statement, it's far from surprising that I spent today at a wedding. The bride arranged a ride for me with other guests who live about half a mile from camp (and whose son I know very casually from school). They were lovely people, very interested in sharing their passions with me- freecycling, temple chat boards, and environmentalism. The husband in particular had a lot of passion for talking about environmentalism, and seemed rather confused when I kept agreeing with him- he seemed to expect an argument. But they made my life very much easier.
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tovah623 and her groom's wedding itself was lovely- I had the honor of holding one of the poles of the chuppah, which was a lovely opportunity, and gave me the chance to see faces as the wedding went through. The rabbi officiating was a friend of the groom's family, and also the author of one of the teshuvot about homosexuality that was so much fussed over by the CJLS this last year (it was the one that passed that no one expected to pass). His speaking was not as captivating as at some weddings that I've attended, but it was certainly heartfelt for him, and I had the fun of recognizing his opening Talmudic quote from a piece of text that I learned last year in class. There were a few practical issues- someone had to run back inside for the groom's kittel, and there was a moment of confusion about which side of the chuppah the groom stood on. But everything generally went quite smoothly, and watching the bride and groom was absolutely incredible.
Both the ceremony and the party were somehow more standardly American feeling (versus "pure Jewish" where the stereotypical American stuff and atmosphere feel less present) than I was expecting- there was a wedding cake and your traditional sort of fuss over it (feeding each other pieces of cake) which I have noticed at rather few of the weddings that I've attended, and a lot of secular music and some slow dancing and such, and a lot of toasts and remarks by relatives. The whole thing was very tasteful, and the dancing was a lot of fun- after the first slow dance or two where those of us who were single were just sitting there feeling awkward, they put on some swing, and I grabbed another girl who dances and we went and had fun dancing.
The other new and different part for me was that among my friends (and it was a wedding with more family and fewer college friends than many of the others I've attended), there were I think more folks who were married than who weren't, which made for a different feel, somehow. I started to get this feeling like being single didn't fit in, a couple of times. The amusing part is that I've gotten quite used to going to friends' weddings and having married friends, while another woman I know there who is a year older than me was saying that being at a friend's wedding made her feel so old... I guess it's a reflection of different social realities. At the end, they passed around the bride's and groom's cups of wine from bentshing, (and the bride, in a moment of enthusiasm, said something along the lines of "Everyone should get married"- it was very sweet, although hearing it my internal response was more like: sure I'd love to, but well- you have any suggestions?) and one of those things I feel very ambivalent about, as a custom- I always question how much to respect superstition, even when doing so does no harm, and yet I tend to find them touching anyways.
I came home, joined my roommate in watching part of a movie, and then called my parents and Mom and I tried to go through books in the attic to see what we could get rid of (they're having a tag sale next weekend). We found some that I no longer wanted, but far more were things neither of us could deal with getting rid of- we're both solidly in the packrat camp when it comes to books.
Tomorrow I need to find out when I can/should leave camp and convey that information to my parents, figure out if I'm going to Hora Keff and if so, to how much of it (I think I want to go, if I still can- and I guess for all of it, since I don't really have my own transport, but we'll see), and when I can move back in at school. Besides that, of course I have a regular work day, and we'll probably start getting ready for banquet (on Wednesday- dinner, the last day of camp) either tomorrow or, more likely, on Tuesday.
Considering the above statement, it's far from surprising that I spent today at a wedding. The bride arranged a ride for me with other guests who live about half a mile from camp (and whose son I know very casually from school). They were lovely people, very interested in sharing their passions with me- freecycling, temple chat boards, and environmentalism. The husband in particular had a lot of passion for talking about environmentalism, and seemed rather confused when I kept agreeing with him- he seemed to expect an argument. But they made my life very much easier.
tovah623 and her groom's wedding itself was lovely- I had the honor of holding one of the poles of the chuppah, which was a lovely opportunity, and gave me the chance to see faces as the wedding went through. The rabbi officiating was a friend of the groom's family, and also the author of one of the teshuvot about homosexuality that was so much fussed over by the CJLS this last year (it was the one that passed that no one expected to pass). His speaking was not as captivating as at some weddings that I've attended, but it was certainly heartfelt for him, and I had the fun of recognizing his opening Talmudic quote from a piece of text that I learned last year in class. There were a few practical issues- someone had to run back inside for the groom's kittel, and there was a moment of confusion about which side of the chuppah the groom stood on. But everything generally went quite smoothly, and watching the bride and groom was absolutely incredible. Both the ceremony and the party were somehow more standardly American feeling (versus "pure Jewish" where the stereotypical American stuff and atmosphere feel less present) than I was expecting- there was a wedding cake and your traditional sort of fuss over it (feeding each other pieces of cake) which I have noticed at rather few of the weddings that I've attended, and a lot of secular music and some slow dancing and such, and a lot of toasts and remarks by relatives. The whole thing was very tasteful, and the dancing was a lot of fun- after the first slow dance or two where those of us who were single were just sitting there feeling awkward, they put on some swing, and I grabbed another girl who dances and we went and had fun dancing.
The other new and different part for me was that among my friends (and it was a wedding with more family and fewer college friends than many of the others I've attended), there were I think more folks who were married than who weren't, which made for a different feel, somehow. I started to get this feeling like being single didn't fit in, a couple of times. The amusing part is that I've gotten quite used to going to friends' weddings and having married friends, while another woman I know there who is a year older than me was saying that being at a friend's wedding made her feel so old... I guess it's a reflection of different social realities. At the end, they passed around the bride's and groom's cups of wine from bentshing, (and the bride, in a moment of enthusiasm, said something along the lines of "Everyone should get married"- it was very sweet, although hearing it my internal response was more like: sure I'd love to, but well- you have any suggestions?) and one of those things I feel very ambivalent about, as a custom- I always question how much to respect superstition, even when doing so does no harm, and yet I tend to find them touching anyways.
I came home, joined my roommate in watching part of a movie, and then called my parents and Mom and I tried to go through books in the attic to see what we could get rid of (they're having a tag sale next weekend). We found some that I no longer wanted, but far more were things neither of us could deal with getting rid of- we're both solidly in the packrat camp when it comes to books.
Tomorrow I need to find out when I can/should leave camp and convey that information to my parents, figure out if I'm going to Hora Keff and if so, to how much of it (I think I want to go, if I still can- and I guess for all of it, since I don't really have my own transport, but we'll see), and when I can move back in at school. Besides that, of course I have a regular work day, and we'll probably start getting ready for banquet (on Wednesday- dinner, the last day of camp) either tomorrow or, more likely, on Tuesday.