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debka_notion ([personal profile] debka_notion) wrote2004-05-24 11:44 pm

First Day Home Lonliness

It's funny- they expect students to get homesick when they're at school. Instead, I come home and the first week, give or take a few days, feels disoriented and lonely- it feels like home, sort of, but all the people I spend my time with are missing. Mom and I started sorting my things too, and she's having me throw out a bunch of my clothes, and that's always sort of painful when they're things I still like. She insisted that lots of my stuff is junk and raggedy, and she needs to get rid of it so she can get me newer stuff that's in better shape. And she's probably right- but it doesn't mean I really like it. Overall, it's just weird. Being home is nice, but rather than feeling relaxed, I wander around starting things and not finishing them a lot and missing school. I don't like not having one homebase. I'm a homebody, but I make that home where the people I care about are, and where I've put a couple sort of symbolic things. Unfortunately, one of htose is my quilt, and that doesn't go with my stuff at home, so it's in a suitecase in the attic. So for once my usually very useful strategy comes and bites me. A bit longer and I'll adjust, but hte next few days will be kind of rough. Life will go one, but- urgh for now. Especially with chag coming up.

The grandparents came over this afternoon, and we went out to dinner. Unfortunately, the restaurant, which is a long time family favorite, was really lousy. The food was tasteless. GO figure. But it was a good grandparental visit.

[identity profile] tatienuta.livejournal.com 2004-05-24 09:15 pm (UTC)(link)
YES! I concur.

Changing homes every couple of months is very unsettling. But since I've lived more at Brandeis these past 3 years than at home-home, I also feel like Brandeis is my home-home more than my home-home. Does that make sense? It's weird, overall, this whole moving around business.

[identity profile] debka-notion.livejournal.com 2004-05-24 09:19 pm (UTC)(link)
It makes Lots of sense. I feel the same way a lot of the time. And I have a friend who was, for a while, referring to her parents house, her dorm/college, and the town she'd grown up in all as "home" and really confusing us all.

[identity profile] tirerim.livejournal.com 2004-05-25 01:53 am (UTC)(link)
For a while, I referred to college and both my parent's houses (150 miles apart) as home. I usually just amended my statements to specify which one I meant when it wasn't obvious. Now I try to only refer to where I actually live as home (especially since I don't spend much time at my parents' houses), but I still find myself slipping about that sometimes. It might help if I finished moving out at some point.