Religious Arrogance

Friday night I was at shul with Mom and the grandparents, at the shul I grew up at- a Reform shul, the sort that's moved to a lot more traditionally Jewish position between when my father was growing up there and even when I got there- when he was a kid, people used to jokingly call it "the church on the hill". And it was not the sort of service I prefer- it never is. But I had a very hard time not getting all arrogant about how much more serious I am about the texts, and how the tune they chose for Lecha Dodi (a traditional mystical text/song sung on Friday night, welcoming Shabbat as the Sabbath Bride) sounded terribly Christian, etc. I went knowing that this wouldn't be an ideal service for me, but that this was the way I was raised- in the right mood, there is plenty to find in the service that is spiritually meaningful. If nothing else, all the English readings that I find pretty tacky and nowhere near as powerful as the Hebrew, or even as a stark translation of the Hebrew text would be, are all sort of nostalgic for me. And yet- I had a very hard time beating down the religious arrogance. What gives me the right to decide that my way is better than theirs, or that I'm really doing better than they are? And yet, it's such an easy fault to fall into. The same thing happens when Mom asks me to check out a song they're thinking about singing, when the text is unfamiliar, and the translation given turns out to be the sort that keeps difficult Hebrew and just chooses not to translate it. It's hard not to get a prideful boost, and to feel superior that not only can I read the text, but that I can integrate it into a meaningful worship experience for myself, and they don't. It isn't something I like about myself, but I'm not sure how to go about changing it.

Religious Arrogance

Friday night I was at shul with Mom and the grandparents, at the shul I grew up at- a Reform shul, the sort that's moved to a lot more traditionally Jewish position between when my father was growing up there and even when I got there- when he was a kid, people used to jokingly call it "the church on the hill". And it was not the sort of service I prefer- it never is. But I had a very hard time not getting all arrogant about how much more serious I am about the texts, and how the tune they chose for Lecha Dodi (a traditional mystical text/song sung on Friday night, welcoming Shabbat as the Sabbath Bride) sounded terribly Christian, etc. I went knowing that this wouldn't be an ideal service for me, but that this was the way I was raised- in the right mood, there is plenty to find in the service that is spiritually meaningful. If nothing else, all the English readings that I find pretty tacky and nowhere near as powerful as the Hebrew, or even as a stark translation of the Hebrew text would be, are all sort of nostalgic for me. And yet- I had a very hard time beating down the religious arrogance. What gives me the right to decide that my way is better than theirs, or that I'm really doing better than they are? And yet, it's such an easy fault to fall into. The same thing happens when Mom asks me to check out a song they're thinking about singing, when the text is unfamiliar, and the translation given turns out to be the sort that keeps difficult Hebrew and just chooses not to translate it. It's hard not to get a prideful boost, and to feel superior that not only can I read the text, but that I can integrate it into a meaningful worship experience for myself, and they don't. It isn't something I like about myself, but I'm not sure how to go about changing it.