A Day For Me, and Some Other Minor Kvetching

[debka_notion]

I took a serious day for myself today. I did very little during most of the day- I spent a chunk of time napping without having to worry too much about where I needed to be right afterwards, and just hanging around. I should have done homework, but I just seriously needed some time just to be. It worked out well- I went to minyan, had a surprise breakfast visit, spent the day relaxing, and then went to a talk about Judaism in the Czech Republic and then to dancing this evening, where I think I spent nearly as much time talking with Steve as dancing.

I'm finding it both interesting and rather frustrating that I can't go to dancing and just dance and hang out anymore. Someone always has to pull the "oh, she's a rabbinical student" card, and I get questions. And I'm happy to have those conversations, but I wish I could have them without the professional hat on. I know, this is going to be my life. And some of it is that this is still a new dance community for me, and will be for a while. Once people get to know me, a bunch of the questions get answered, and don't have to be asked again. Also, then I'm a person, and not just a role, so they can just chat comfortably, hopefully. We'll see how this theory works out. But what used to be a social outlet is now only partially that. But when I have to have this very artificial conversation about how person x whom I've never met was such a great hebrew school principal, just because she was also a rabbinical student and wore a kippah, well- it's frustrating. So was the conversation last night from someone who saw me the one time I was at KOE and wanted to know why I hadn't gone back since, after he had already spoken disparagingly of the same d'var torah that folks had praised at lunch on Shabbos, and then needed me to explain that halakha isn't a monolithic thing- that there is often more than one acceptable halakhic opinion on any issue depending on origin, time period, circumstances, approach, etc, and all that visible within Orthodoxy alone... I know, that's exactly the sort of education I want to put out there. But to be almost chastized for not showing up somewhere to daven by someone who has no idea why I would or wouldn't chose to go there regularly felt unpleasant.

Comments

[taylweaver.livejournal.com]

You know, KOE is a friendly place. You should come back some time... just kidding! (Well, it is friendly - not kidding about that part. But you know what I mean) I hope that if I ever asked you that question (the why didn't you come back one) that I would accept whatever answer you gave as a rather sensible one and move on.

It does kind of stink that you can't just go to dance and have fun. Maybe it is time to say, "look, can we have this conversation another time? I am here to relax."

[hatam-soferet.livejournal.com]

You need a business card, which you hand to people politely and say you're off-duty but if they want to call you during office hours they can. Honestly. Like if you were a lawyer or a doctor. I usually get asked sofer questions on shabbat, and if they're annoying me I say I prefer not to talk business on Shabbat and change the subject - same principle.