Some Ritual Thoughts, Some Silly Thoughts

[debka_notion]

Ritual Thoughts
Yesterday I attended the bris of the baby of the couple near who I generally sit in shul. (Said baby is completely adorable, naturally, and his parents look marvelously happy.) I was really interested by the ceremony itself: it's only the second bris I've attended, and it was totally different in organization and atmosphere from that of sharonaf's son's bris. This one was also head in shul, meaning at JTS, but after mincha on a Sunday, and there was rather a larger crowd with many more friends of the parents, while most of the family was immediate family- the baby's grandparents, aunts and I think a great-aunt or two.

The ritual structure was also much clearer- although it was hard for me to tell at the previous bris due to sanctuary layout (the bris was at the very front of the shul, and there was a Large space between that and the ladies' section: I couldn't hear very much besides the actual bracha and the baby crying). I'm not sure who was saying what when there, whereas at this bris it was very readily apparent, including a rather surprising amount of announcing who'd be doing what- a lot of "and now the baby's maternal grandparents will offer some words" "and now Steve will sing a niggun" "and now Steve's sisters will offer some words". There was a lot of acknowledging various relatives and a few friends at the seminary- the father's chevruta, a particular pair of friends... In the same vein, there was this air of the bris being a teaching opportunity- there were some explanations included for the less informed- about why the baby's father was wearing his tallit (less obvious at a bris after shacharit also, I suppose), about how this is one of the few mitzvot that could be delegated to someone else to perform, etc.

There was also the interesting choice of having communal singing at a few different points in the ceremony, including during the actual bris itself, besides a pause for the brachot. I don't know if it was meant to calm the baby, calm the congregation, keep people occupied, or help people to see it as a spiritual experience, but it was fairly effective at Something, although I'm not entirely sure what. I don't know how common that practice is in this context, but it's something I'd be interested in finding out.

There were of course the obvious differences, in terms of the gender of people who participated, but I think that was less significant than the different attitude- there was no "offering of words" by persons x,y, and z at the earlier bris I attended, while there were a lot of them at this one. I'm not sure how much of that reflects different parental decisions versus different cultural expectations. But it did create a different focus- there was more emphasis placed on the choice of name, the family relationship with the infant and such things as well as the performance of the mitzvah. (I rather wonder how much of that is the Conservative rather than Orthodox cultural dynamic or sense of aesthetics, and how much, if any, is some reverse pollination from simchat bat ceremonies and such.)

Silly Thoughts and Others
Although I haven't seen jessebeller in quite a long time, I had this odd moment where I walked by Steve, whom I'd never before seen sans beard, and who has just shaved (odd time choice) and almost thought it was jessebeller, not that he'd have any particular reason to be sitting in the JTS sanctuary with a guitar. Odd moment. (Especially as Steve is the second individual to remind me of jessebeller in the last couple of weeks.)

We're supposed to be just reading through our next reading for Hebrew class- except our teacher just sent us a rather long vocab list to prepare before class and bring in. This seems rather different from just reading the thing to me... (Teaching us to read using context clues and such seems like it might be a wise thing to teach, since I expect people have gotten rusty since we've built stronger English vocabularies from when we were kids. I know my skills there have gotten rusty, that's for sure. Oh well.)

I'd thought I was supposed to have a quiz on Second Kings tomorrow, but it turns out that said quiz is next week. This is useful, as this week is rather packed.

There was a dinner tonight for rabbinical and cantorial students and faculty with chancellor Eisen about the decision to admit gay and lesbian students to said schools at JTS. I'm not sure what I think about said dinner yet- I'll probably talk about it at some point. But now- off to work on massive quantities of torah reading...

Comments

[shirei-shibolim.livejournal.com]

"And now Steve will dance a hornpipe" is a good way to coordinate different participants in sequence when there hasn't been a lot of rehearsal time. It turned out to be especially useful this time, since I understand that different people's contributions had to be slightly re-ordered at the last second.

I'm not sure why Conservative brises tend to be longer and talkier (though I think your general perception is right). All I know is that, should I have any sons, I want the thing to be over with as fast as possible. Standing around and talking just builds the stress. (Did I mention that I nearly lost consciousness at the last bris I attended prior to this one?)

Very curious to hear about the dinner. I couldn't make it. Did you happen to see the "101" sheets in the cafeteria today?

[hatam-soferet.livejournal.com]

Was said bris your own? :P

Steve and I also had a brilliant idea involving freezing the placenta for a week and having a fry-up at the bris. And it would be parve, so there could be ice-cream :)

[shirei-shibolim.livejournal.com]

Was said bris your own? :P

Nah, that would have been a cheap move. This was just before last summer. It was a late morning bris and I hadn't had anything to eat or drink all day, and was a little shaky in the first place. Then the kid started screaming bloody murder when they undressed him, all while the father looked like he was about to collapse into smaller component parts. Both of these factors led to a slight dilation of my own blood vessels. The assembled cantorial students were asked to sing a niggun, which further deprived my brain of oxygen, and then I actually saw the procedure, which I never had before. I didn't so much faint as gradually drift lower and lower without realizing, until someone had to catch me.

Steve and I also had a brilliant idea involving freezing the placenta for a week and having a fry-up at the bris. And it would be parve, so there could be ice-cream :)

Jen!

[kmelion.livejournal.com]

Is human placenta even kosher? Besides, it has the added onus of being taken from a living animal...

The britot I've been to (yes, they've all been Orthodox) have all the speeches during the seudah. Often the father will speak about how he and the mother chose the name and talk a bit about the person the baby is named after. Then a relative who knew the person the baby is named after will speak a bit more about the person and then a Rabbi of the shul, or the Rosh Yeshiva will get up and blather for way too long.

In the book I got about Britot, the author says that although there can be many honorifics bestowed upon guests and relatives, it's generally broken down to the Kvatter, the Sandik and one other person to say two to four other brachot.

[margavriel.livejournal.com]

Something in the back of my memory is telling me that human placenta is kosher, but I can't remember exactly what.

Supposedly, there's a superstition in certain (North African?) communities to eat the actual foreskin that has been removed, though most of the rabbis in those communities oppose the practice. (I have heard this all from hearsay from an incredibly unreliable source.)

[hotshot2000.livejournal.com]

It's in Minhagei Yisrael -- I'll find the ref. later.

[shirei-shibolim.livejournal.com]

Human placenta is in fact kosher and pareve. I'm not sure of the technical reason for ever min hachai not applying, though intuitively it strikes me as a different circumstance. Humans are generally not treated as treif animals (nor as kosher ones), but as something else entirely.

A speech during the seuda wouldn't bother me so much. It's when they delay the bris itself that I get all shaky.

[debka-notion.livejournal.com]

Maybe it doesn't count as ever min hachai because it separates from the mother's body naturally? By the time you'd come to eat it, it wouldn't be a limb of a live body anymore...

[shirei-shibolim.livejournal.com]

That would make sense. Leads me to wonder: There are several species of animal, in classes from reptile to echinoderm, that shed parts of their bodies in order to escape predators in pursuit. Would such tissue, if eaten, constitute a violation of the Noachide commandments or just the usual matters of kashrut?

[debka-notion.livejournal.com]

Oh my. I know different cultures do all sorts of weird things with placentas, but eating it at a bris would be pretty darn up there in the weird scales.

[debka-notion.livejournal.com]

Yes, I noticed the reordering too. It's just something that takes a bit of skill and a special sort of tact to make flow well. This felt a little abrupt. But well- I'd guess that pretty much all brises would have that edge of anxiety and confusion since there isn't so much time to plan them. (At the bris for sharonaf's son, the same confusion seemed to be delegated to questions of "where's the baby supposed to be now" "do we put him on the pillow yet" "should the mother be upstairs or downstairs to nurse him after the bris and before going to be with all the folks hanging out and eating".)

Maybe because people have less concept of a ritual that doesn't have long talky bits? I mean, think about the way Conservative shabbos services happen in most suburban shuls, versus Orthodox ones- at least those that I've been at: still a fairly small sample of each population. This did at least seem to be standing and talking while the mohel did some of the prep that he seems to have done while making folks just stand around without even ritual talkiness to keep them busy at the other bris... (You did, shortly after that event occurred, I believe.)

You'll hear about it- but probably not tonight... No, I didn't- what were they?

[hatam-soferet.livejournal.com]

Steve and I went to a bris a while back which was not in JTS, and it was similarly educational, and very well done. I think the mohel realised that it's really a tremendously dull procedure if you're just hanging out in the audience, given that there's bugger all to see, and what there is to see isn't very pretty.

I thought the bit about "few mitzvot" was a bit silly. You can delegate nearly all mitzvot.

[shirei-shibolim.livejournal.com]

I thought the bit about "few mitzvot" was a bit silly. You can delegate nearly all mitzvot.

Yeah, that was really very odd. You score extra points to your related comment.

[margavriel.livejournal.com]

There was also the interesting choice of having communal singing at a few different points in the ceremony, including during the actual bris itself, besides a pause for the brachot.

Not common. I believe that I have seen such practice only at (cough, cough) Carlebachian berisôs. Of course, it is traditional to sing certain songs during the festive meal that follows the actual ceremony, but (unfortunately) I have not actually seen this at most of the berisôs that I have attended. (And I have attended an average of about 6 or 7 berisôs each year for the past, I dunno, 10 years.)

[taylweaver.livejournal.com]

I think a lot of what goes on at a bris depends on the parties involved: each mohel has his own style - some like to crack jokes, others like to explain, and others just go about their business - and each family has their own style. And it can also depend on when the bris occurs and what preceded it and how long it takes to set up, and how formal the seudah that follows it will be.

I had the good fortune to attend a bris at KOE that took place on Simchat Torah. We were happy to have it, but we only had the room until 4 pm - because when we reserved the room, of course, we weren't figuring on a bris - and tefillot ended around 3. So in that case, there were very concrete time constraints - plus, the fact that no one had eaten anything more than kiddush food and it was well past lunch time. (though we may have had bagels at kiddush - that was our original plan anyway).

So all sorts of thing can mess with a bris.

The fun part about my family is that we have a mohel "in the family" - as in, my cousin's father-in-law, and he is the kind who explains things and who has a sense of humor. Plus, he knows his audience - or at least the family end of it, which always helps.

And even among Orthodox brisses, there is variation, of course. I have attended two brisses at which my father was honored with naming the baby (a great way to get him to reschedule a business trip, in one case). At one of them, the father would not tell him the name in advance - and he spent the whole time panicking that he would get it wrong (or worse, accidentally grimace) when it was whispered in his ear. At the other one, he was much happier, because the parents had thoughtfully written it out for him and shown it to him.

See, even little things make a difference!