debka_notion (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
debka_notion) wrote2007-06-17 10:49 am
debka_notion) wrote2007-06-17 10:49 am
Idealism
Idealism and Why I'm Still Doing the Conservative Jewish Thing
Several times lately, I've had these conversations where I end up thinking that yes, there's something impractical about doing this Egalitarian, Observant Conservative thing, and finding that it's a contrast between what would be practical and what I'm sticking to because I refuse to give up my idealism. The issue first came up, I think, talking with![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
hotshot2000 about egalitarian minyanim, and how they tend to be predominantly women. It's certainly a problem, with rather clear social roots: in American society, or particularly in Christian society, women are expected to be the religious ones, and men are expected to be not particularly interested. So when you let up on Needing Men and Men Only for religious responsibilities, Men stop feeling as interested, and the percentage of men who come to shul drops. This is a generalization- but it happens all too often, and it's a problem. I get that it's a problem. But to say that "Ideally, I think that egalitarianism is ok and even good, but it causes this social problem, so I'm not going to go by it" is just too much for my idealism- I want to Try other solutions to the problem at least first. (Anyone think that with all these women's Rosh Hodesh things, it might be a good idea to build up some good men's-only programming? I don't know that Men's Rosh Hodesh groups would work- but darn it, if we're going to make shul gender-equal space, and it really does feel like most people want Some sort of gender separate stuff occasionally- then Men deserve such programming too. If women get some, men should too. Just because I don't want my shul to be primarily men's territory doesn't mean that there shouldn't be some strong experience, preferally ritual in some way, say, monthly, that Is gender separate.) Anything new is going to have growing pains. I refuse to give up on my principles just because they're a little bit difficult.
The same goes for being associated with the Conservative movement/with egalitarian observant Judaism from the perspective of "almost no one outside the rabbinate and their families is really observant". I hear it all the time, I see it, etc. And I want an observant community. But I don't want to give up on my ideals just because the community that is already where I want my community is Orthodox or things approximating it. Sure, it's rough. But I'm not going to roll over and pretend to be something I'm not just because that's where I'm going to fit in better. I'm not ready to give up that idealism, for whatever it's worth.
The Weekend Thus Far
(Here's what's likely to be the boring part.)
Shabbos turned out pretty well- I hadmasteraleph and a friend of his over for dinner, and managed not to make too much food for once. Shul in the morning was incredibly close and convenient, and then lunch was pleasant also. In the early evening, we went to Shakespeare on the Run and saw Love's Labors Lost, then made havdalah and hung around a bit. I joined folks for pizza before they headed out for a show, but as my subway took a while, it was a rather rushed eating, but luckily I was hanging out with calliope_epic afterwards. We watched one of my favorite movies (Antonia's Line) and ate raspberries.
Today: people coming in the afternoon, dancing at night. Tomorrow, off to camp.
Several times lately, I've had these conversations where I end up thinking that yes, there's something impractical about doing this Egalitarian, Observant Conservative thing, and finding that it's a contrast between what would be practical and what I'm sticking to because I refuse to give up my idealism. The issue first came up, I think, talking with
hotshot2000 about egalitarian minyanim, and how they tend to be predominantly women. It's certainly a problem, with rather clear social roots: in American society, or particularly in Christian society, women are expected to be the religious ones, and men are expected to be not particularly interested. So when you let up on Needing Men and Men Only for religious responsibilities, Men stop feeling as interested, and the percentage of men who come to shul drops. This is a generalization- but it happens all too often, and it's a problem. I get that it's a problem. But to say that "Ideally, I think that egalitarianism is ok and even good, but it causes this social problem, so I'm not going to go by it" is just too much for my idealism- I want to Try other solutions to the problem at least first. (Anyone think that with all these women's Rosh Hodesh things, it might be a good idea to build up some good men's-only programming? I don't know that Men's Rosh Hodesh groups would work- but darn it, if we're going to make shul gender-equal space, and it really does feel like most people want Some sort of gender separate stuff occasionally- then Men deserve such programming too. If women get some, men should too. Just because I don't want my shul to be primarily men's territory doesn't mean that there shouldn't be some strong experience, preferally ritual in some way, say, monthly, that Is gender separate.) Anything new is going to have growing pains. I refuse to give up on my principles just because they're a little bit difficult. The same goes for being associated with the Conservative movement/with egalitarian observant Judaism from the perspective of "almost no one outside the rabbinate and their families is really observant". I hear it all the time, I see it, etc. And I want an observant community. But I don't want to give up on my ideals just because the community that is already where I want my community is Orthodox or things approximating it. Sure, it's rough. But I'm not going to roll over and pretend to be something I'm not just because that's where I'm going to fit in better. I'm not ready to give up that idealism, for whatever it's worth.
The Weekend Thus Far
(Here's what's likely to be the boring part.)
Shabbos turned out pretty well- I had
masteraleph and a friend of his over for dinner, and managed not to make too much food for once. Shul in the morning was incredibly close and convenient, and then lunch was pleasant also. In the early evening, we went to Shakespeare on the Run and saw Love's Labors Lost, then made havdalah and hung around a bit. I joined folks for pizza before they headed out for a show, but as my subway took a while, it was a rather rushed eating, but luckily I was hanging out with calliope_epic afterwards. We watched one of my favorite movies (Antonia's Line) and ate raspberries. Today: people coming in the afternoon, dancing at night. Tomorrow, off to camp.
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