Egalitarian Observance

[debka_notion]

I've been thinking about why women who are, in Egalitarian set ups, as observant as or more so than many men who wear kippot, don't. Ditto things like tzitzit, although that's harder to tell about. In general, I've noticed that women are must less consistent about such things: note the number of women who wear a tallit but no kippah/headcovering or kippah and no tallit (more understandable, if they want to follow Ashkenaz custom about no tallit until marriage), when they behave as if they're obligated equally with men otherwise. I'm simplifying here: I understand that people could see a tallit or a kippah as men's clothing, and therefore not something a woman would feel comfortable with wearing. But- if men cover their heads, why don't equally observant egalitarian women?

My personal reaction to that question, which Mom brought up a while ago, is that it seems like a much more militant feminist statement than a statement of Jewish observance. It just isn't saying what I think it should be. It says "look at me, I'm making a big show of doing everything that men do", not "I believe in what I'm doing, and standing by my obligations". But- it seems almost assumed that a girl wouldn't make that decision. Not that I don't know one or two women who do, but it's far from as common. I guess I don't know what the full thought process is when a man makes that decision, so I don't know if it's similar or not.

The idea popped back in my head recently, both over Shabbat in a discussion of feminism, and yesterday, when I went to orthodox services for Mincha/Maariv (afternoon and evening prayers), and, besides being one of 2 women who actually stayed for Maariv (there were only 6 of us to begin with, versus I'd guess 15-20 men), since one or two planned on getting to late maariv, and others don't hold themselves obligated to pray three times a day, I realized that wearing a kippah might not be the most socially smart thing to do, since I don't have any really unobtrusive ones (I've seen ones so similar to one's hair color that they're hard to see). So I grabbed a scarf, tied it in a way that it covered some of my head, rather than the way I usually wear it, bunched up, as a headband. I figured that it would look like a headband, and G-d and I would know it was a purposeful headcovering. I suppose that is a similar idea to the really unobtrusive kippah. I suppose I really ought ot look into the real significance of a kippah: I was always taught it was a respect or a differentiation thing. But in both those cases, I'm not sure what would make it so gender specific, culturally. (Religiously, it makes sense fro mteh orthodox perspective: since one doesn't wear one to sleep, it's therefore timebound, and women are excempt, although I find that with the background given, that principle has been widely overapplied. That is, of course, why I'm not orthodox, or one of the reasons, though.)

Comments

kippot...

[shorr.livejournal.com]

From what I gather, the Kippah is a really recent development, not so much a religious one as much as a social one. It's a differentiation, in a way, a "Jewish Pride" symbol of sorts. It's a marker, an identifier, too. I don't know what the religious sources are for it. I do know, though, that there are plenty (plenty) of Orthodox men (friends of mine included) who do not wear 'em (at least, not outside religious circumstances). It's odd to me that Jewish feminist movements tend to shy away from head-coverings after marriage (which are considerably more traditional than Kippot... although they too have their variations as far as customs go -- some folks have the custom, others don't, and the customs are themselves very varied) while at the same time, these movements tend towards women wearing kippot (a considerably less traditional head covering.) My mother wears hats to services. That's the extent of the head covering she feels obligated towards. Why do what the men do when you've got (at least, post-marriage) a potential custom of your own? Granted, there are differences (head coverings aren't required 'til marriage, for one), but again, it strikes me as a little strange. I expect I'd understand more if I knew more, but here my lack of knowledge becomes known. So, yeah, that's taht, I guess.
-AzS

[fleurdelis28.livejournal.com]

Just thought I'd point out it's perfectly possible to cover one's head without a kippah, assuming the purpose is to show/remind yourself of deference to God, rather than to show the world who you are. My second-grade teacher put post-it notes on the heads of boys who'd forgotten kippot, when b'rachot arose.

I certainly hope a headband is not inappropriate... ;P