A choice for Practicality

[debka_notion]

Am skipping the Orthodox minyan's dawn minyan tomorrow (well, Tuesday morning) because it's too much bother to daven, then come back and repeat shema with tallit and tfillin. If I could find an isolated spot, I'd be tempted to just go with egal ritualgear and all, but that would Not be nice. And I need the sleep. But I did go to mincha-maariv today: and was not the only woman who stayed for maariv- there was one other. But I couldn't hear any of the other women respond to anything. ANyone know if there's a reason why they don't respond audibly to say, kaddish? Or Amen to anything? As it is, it feels like this weird cultural silencing, and it weirds me out.

Comments

[nuqotw.livejournal.com]

On those rare days when I get organized enough to make it to minyan (the Penn Hillel Orthodox one) I put on tallit and t'fillin there. It has not been a problem. It's as much my minyan as it is anyone else's. And I respond as I would at any other minyan, which is to say audibly.

There are unfortunately times when I cannot respond because the shatz on the other side wasn't loud enough for me to hear.

[debka-notion.livejournal.com]

People don't get weirded out/offended?

[nuqotw.livejournal.com]

What if I am weirded out/offended by intolerance? So far, minds are fairly open. For a while, I would lay tallit/t'fillin at the minyan on weekdays, but for holidays/shabbat I would put on tallit and daven shaharit before going to shul. Then Rosh HaShanah rolled around (I went to Orthodox, a small tale unto itself) and I realized that I couldn't bring myself to daven in advance and then stand around feeling naked in shul. I figured it was the same minyan, and I wasn't going to surprise anyone. And after doing so on Rosh Hashanah, I pretty much do my thing. Some people have asked, but no one (as far as I know) has been offended.

The only offense I have ever drawn is curiously enough from a few who are Orthodox (and fully observant) but philosophically and practically less machmir than I. These unfortunate situations have arisen outside of the tallit/t'fillin sphere. I can only conclude that such people feel threatened by orthodoxy that is right of their Orthodoxy.

[debka-notion.livejournal.com]

I agree with you in principle, but in action I tend to want to make sure that people around me are comfortable- and while I've found that my individual orthodox friends are comfortable with me davening in full ritualgear, that other people aren't so comfortable. And in that space, I feel like I'm in their territory, and therefore I should try to conform in some ways. I'm not sure why I'm more willing ot comform about ritualwear (or that it's enough to keep me away from there for shacharit mostly), but not about volume.