phrase of the night

My comment to jakal88 on why I need to get up in the morning at better (aka earlier) times again:
'
debkafantastique: my tfillin are lonely

phrase of the night

My comment to jakal88 on why I need to get up in the morning at better (aka earlier) times again:
'
debkafantastique: my tfillin are lonely

Thoughts on an Ad

Just saw an ad banner over one of my email accounts that was advertising smileys for one's email- logical enough for such placement, and while I've never wanted to use such graphics, plenty of other people do- no problem there. But it offered a few examples of the ones available, including one that had a heart behind it with the text "Hi sexy", and an animated winking smiley face. Ok- tasteless but not problematic. Except that the way the face had been depicted, it looked specifically childlike. It had wide blue eyes and a very innocent look. And while I know I have a strong tendency to misunderstand smileys, this one just really bothered me. There's too much of a tendency to sexualize children as is, it seems. Sexuality doesn't seem like the sort of thing one should push, it ought to develop at its own rate. Making it, or some semblance thereof acceptable and even preferable for children who still look childlike seems like a confusion of social function at best. Certain aspects of adulthood and childhood Should be separated, and making the sly wink that indicates attraction into a cheery, active, round-cheeked wink just makes me shudder.

Thoughts on an Ad

Just saw an ad banner over one of my email accounts that was advertising smileys for one's email- logical enough for such placement, and while I've never wanted to use such graphics, plenty of other people do- no problem there. But it offered a few examples of the ones available, including one that had a heart behind it with the text "Hi sexy", and an animated winking smiley face. Ok- tasteless but not problematic. Except that the way the face had been depicted, it looked specifically childlike. It had wide blue eyes and a very innocent look. And while I know I have a strong tendency to misunderstand smileys, this one just really bothered me. There's too much of a tendency to sexualize children as is, it seems. Sexuality doesn't seem like the sort of thing one should push, it ought to develop at its own rate. Making it, or some semblance thereof acceptable and even preferable for children who still look childlike seems like a confusion of social function at best. Certain aspects of adulthood and childhood Should be separated, and making the sly wink that indicates attraction into a cheery, active, round-cheeked wink just makes me shudder.

The Classic Spontaneous Cohen Shot, Or More Thoughts on Ritual and Culture

(The Classic Spontaneous Cohen Shot: my mother's term for the carefully arranged table photographs taken of every table at Every event involving my father's family, primarily a result of the actions of my paternal grandmother's family, the Cohens [although they're not Kohanim, the original last name was Alpert- our very own Elis Island story], since my grandfather has Many fewer relatives.)

I was just looking through my grandmother's photo albums which are currently residing in our attic. They're rather a jumble, but I came across a well-organized section of photos from my grandparents' wedding, and a large album from my father's bar mitzvah. I was really rather surprised at which things were the same as events/photos of my own bat mitzvah, or as the weddings of friends which I have recently attended, and which things were different. The bar mitzvah album was probably more easily comparable: there were photos of the whole candle lighting routine- the one with 13/14 candles on a cake, in which the bar/bat mitzvah calls up different relatives and friends to light assorted candles, usually with rather tacky (and occasionally rhymed- ugh) tribute mini-speeches. I had thought that that was a creation of my generation, since my parents and I decided to do it only after seeing it at assorted friends/cousins' b'nei mitzvah celebrations. Now That would be an interesting thing to trace, although how one would do so, I don't particularly know. I don't know how such a thing would have originated. It seems like such a random piece of folk-ritual, especially considering how anti-folk-ritual people have been during the last century in general (yes, major generalization, but you get the point. My father is not young enough that he'd have had his bar mitzvah after the ressurgence of ethnic pride and ritual reclamation. And this isn't even that- it's a secular ritual associated with a religious event.) I suppose one could do interviews, and maybe check for responsa on whether or not it is permitted- but whether or not such documents exist is beyond me: I don't even know if it is something that is or was used at Orthodox b'nei mitzvah celebrations.

Added: Anyone interested in sharing their own experiences with/knowledge on these candlelighting ceremonies? So I can get an idea of how much it spreads? Also to asauge my general curiosity?

As for my grandparents' wedding pictures: I was rather surprised at how similar wedding dresses have stayed over that range of time. Certainly there were Some style differences, but not so many as I might have thought. There were a great many more hats in the photos than I might have thought (I was similarly surprised by the fact that my grandmother and great-grandmother were wearing white gloves at my father's bar mitzvah- I didn't realize that that was still done by then. Just goes to show how inaccurate my perceptions of fashion history are.). Certainly there was a great deal more attention paid to who wore what in my grandparents' wedding announcement clipped from the newspaper than there was in my parents' announcement, which described professions and schooling instead. I wonder how much of that is what information the paper asks for, and how much is just what one gives them. I was surprised at how dark-colored my grandparents' chuppah seems to have been: the ones I've seen have been white, or decorated in fairly light colors, if they aren't quilted ones, which seem to be much the fashion. I'd never seen a dark one before. Go figure.

The Classic Spontaneous Cohen Shot, Or More Thoughts on Ritual and Culture

(The Classic Spontaneous Cohen Shot: my mother's term for the carefully arranged table photographs taken of every table at Every event involving my father's family, primarily a result of the actions of my paternal grandmother's family, the Cohens [although they're not Kohanim, the original last name was Alpert- our very own Elis Island story], since my grandfather has Many fewer relatives.)

I was just looking through my grandmother's photo albums which are currently residing in our attic. They're rather a jumble, but I came across a well-organized section of photos from my grandparents' wedding, and a large album from my father's bar mitzvah. I was really rather surprised at which things were the same as events/photos of my own bat mitzvah, or as the weddings of friends which I have recently attended, and which things were different. The bar mitzvah album was probably more easily comparable: there were photos of the whole candle lighting routine- the one with 13/14 candles on a cake, in which the bar/bat mitzvah calls up different relatives and friends to light assorted candles, usually with rather tacky (and occasionally rhymed- ugh) tribute mini-speeches. I had thought that that was a creation of my generation, since my parents and I decided to do it only after seeing it at assorted friends/cousins' b'nei mitzvah celebrations. Now That would be an interesting thing to trace, although how one would do so, I don't particularly know. I don't know how such a thing would have originated. It seems like such a random piece of folk-ritual, especially considering how anti-folk-ritual people have been during the last century in general (yes, major generalization, but you get the point. My father is not young enough that he'd have had his bar mitzvah after the ressurgence of ethnic pride and ritual reclamation. And this isn't even that- it's a secular ritual associated with a religious event.) I suppose one could do interviews, and maybe check for responsa on whether or not it is permitted- but whether or not such documents exist is beyond me: I don't even know if it is something that is or was used at Orthodox b'nei mitzvah celebrations.

Added: Anyone interested in sharing their own experiences with/knowledge on these candlelighting ceremonies? So I can get an idea of how much it spreads? Also to asauge my general curiosity?

As for my grandparents' wedding pictures: I was rather surprised at how similar wedding dresses have stayed over that range of time. Certainly there were Some style differences, but not so many as I might have thought. There were a great many more hats in the photos than I might have thought (I was similarly surprised by the fact that my grandmother and great-grandmother were wearing white gloves at my father's bar mitzvah- I didn't realize that that was still done by then. Just goes to show how inaccurate my perceptions of fashion history are.). Certainly there was a great deal more attention paid to who wore what in my grandparents' wedding announcement clipped from the newspaper than there was in my parents' announcement, which described professions and schooling instead. I wonder how much of that is what information the paper asks for, and how much is just what one gives them. I was surprised at how dark-colored my grandparents' chuppah seems to have been: the ones I've seen have been white, or decorated in fairly light colors, if they aren't quilted ones, which seem to be much the fashion. I'd never seen a dark one before. Go figure.