Here There and Everywhere

I seem to have bopped around quite a bit this weekend thus far, and it is not quite over. Friday night I went to davenen at the Seminary, which felt very empty and sort of scattered- it was a seminary shabbat weekend, so this makes sense. So I bopped out of there pretty soon after davening actually finished and walked over to the Bayit to have dinner with a friend there and his older sister who is a friend of mine from college, and had seligdavis "chastise" me for coming for one of the meals when he's out, when I didn't come to his meal- which confused me, as I hadn't been invited to the meal he was talking about. But all was amicable, and dinner involved some very amusing discussions of standard Jewish text sorts of things, but well, the funny bits, for the most part. I have no idea what happened with the people at the other end of the table, I'm not sure I actually even met them, but whatever. I did acquire a recipe for tofu pot pie out of the meal, and saw that my host made it in a disposable regular rectagular baking dish, which means I could do so as well, which means I could make either that Or a regular vegetable pot pie even though I don't actually have anything ressembling a pie plate. After dinner we went to part of the Pizmon concert, which was lovely, and hung around and chatted afterwards.

Said conversation included a discussion of the Ortho-clone phenomenon. I don't know what's behind it, but it was something we had all noticed- that while certainly there are lots of folks with actual distinctive personalities in the Orthodox world (if you're reading this, this category probably means you, presuming that you're one of those folks Coming from the Orthodox world), but that there are also lots of folks, especially the girls, who seem to have been shaped into about the same person: they know the same people, had the same experiences growing up, talk about exactly the same things, and few of those things have much depth, and continue on in that pattern. It means that they in some ways Can't interact with other folks because they are out of that system and Can't talk about all the same people that they all know from school and camp, etc.

Saturday morning, davening was a very different experience from usual- there was a Senior Sermon, and enough people were expected that the chairs were rearranged into all straight rows, and as many chairs were crammed into there as possible. I was not particularly looking forward to it, but didn't really feel like figuring out where else to go, so I stayed. It turned out to be a very nice service, and the sermon itself was actually interesting and productive. The friends from the previous night showed up, and we chitchatted after shul until they went to lunch and I left for lunch.

Lunch occupied the rest of Shabbos- nuqotw hosted a very pleasant meal with a similar crowd to some of the meals last week (calliope_epic and her SO, mbarr taylweaver, Steve and her SO, Steve-who'd-also-been-at-dinner-Friday-night, and some other folks). Many of us ended up hanging around, realizing we had no particular Saturday night plans, and creating some- watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail together. So it turned into quite a pleasant evening as well. (Pleasant seems to be my over-used adjective of the day.)

Sunday I got up and headed to my parents' place to visit (the first time I've ever gone home for an afternoon visit: we weren't exactly sure what to do with an afternoon-sized chunk of time, but it was good to be home and see them), and returned in time to have a bit of dinner, sort of, and head to dancing. This meant that I wasn't back in time to do my usual learning with Steve, but as neither of us are so fond of the teaching of this week's guest teacher, we decided that I'd bring the books and we'd learn during her teaching. This worked quite well, although it probably reinforced the "wow, those folks are weird" thing that most of the folks there already have about us, I'd think. And then there was a bit of dancing, and then more teaching, including a triple's dance where I was displaced in my triple, without much objection, as the steps seemed easy and I don't usually like being told "dance with these people, you have no choice in the matter", even if that means that one is assured people to dance with- maybe I'm a bit of a snob about such things, but I like when I can at least Choose when I want to dance with folks who don't know what they're doing. So there was a lot of chatting, for quite a while. But dancing eventually picked up.

Today has been minyan, a surprise visit from Steve, and some napping. I found myself pretty exhausted. Plans for the rest of the day: groceries, plan a get-together for Saturday night, do some homework, attend a talk at 7 and go dancing after that.

Here There and Everywhere

I seem to have bopped around quite a bit this weekend thus far, and it is not quite over. Friday night I went to davenen at the Seminary, which felt very empty and sort of scattered- it was a seminary shabbat weekend, so this makes sense. So I bopped out of there pretty soon after davening actually finished and walked over to the Bayit to have dinner with a friend there and his older sister who is a friend of mine from college, and had seligdavis "chastise" me for coming for one of the meals when he's out, when I didn't come to his meal- which confused me, as I hadn't been invited to the meal he was talking about. But all was amicable, and dinner involved some very amusing discussions of standard Jewish text sorts of things, but well, the funny bits, for the most part. I have no idea what happened with the people at the other end of the table, I'm not sure I actually even met them, but whatever. I did acquire a recipe for tofu pot pie out of the meal, and saw that my host made it in a disposable regular rectagular baking dish, which means I could do so as well, which means I could make either that Or a regular vegetable pot pie even though I don't actually have anything ressembling a pie plate. After dinner we went to part of the Pizmon concert, which was lovely, and hung around and chatted afterwards.

Said conversation included a discussion of the Ortho-clone phenomenon. I don't know what's behind it, but it was something we had all noticed- that while certainly there are lots of folks with actual distinctive personalities in the Orthodox world (if you're reading this, this category probably means you, presuming that you're one of those folks Coming from the Orthodox world), but that there are also lots of folks, especially the girls, who seem to have been shaped into about the same person: they know the same people, had the same experiences growing up, talk about exactly the same things, and few of those things have much depth, and continue on in that pattern. It means that they in some ways Can't interact with other folks because they are out of that system and Can't talk about all the same people that they all know from school and camp, etc.

Saturday morning, davening was a very different experience from usual- there was a Senior Sermon, and enough people were expected that the chairs were rearranged into all straight rows, and as many chairs were crammed into there as possible. I was not particularly looking forward to it, but didn't really feel like figuring out where else to go, so I stayed. It turned out to be a very nice service, and the sermon itself was actually interesting and productive. The friends from the previous night showed up, and we chitchatted after shul until they went to lunch and I left for lunch.

Lunch occupied the rest of Shabbos- nuqotw hosted a very pleasant meal with a similar crowd to some of the meals last week (calliope_epic and her SO, mbarr taylweaver, Steve and her SO, Steve-who'd-also-been-at-dinner-Friday-night, and some other folks). Many of us ended up hanging around, realizing we had no particular Saturday night plans, and creating some- watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail together. So it turned into quite a pleasant evening as well. (Pleasant seems to be my over-used adjective of the day.)

Sunday I got up and headed to my parents' place to visit (the first time I've ever gone home for an afternoon visit: we weren't exactly sure what to do with an afternoon-sized chunk of time, but it was good to be home and see them), and returned in time to have a bit of dinner, sort of, and head to dancing. This meant that I wasn't back in time to do my usual learning with Steve, but as neither of us are so fond of the teaching of this week's guest teacher, we decided that I'd bring the books and we'd learn during her teaching. This worked quite well, although it probably reinforced the "wow, those folks are weird" thing that most of the folks there already have about us, I'd think. And then there was a bit of dancing, and then more teaching, including a triple's dance where I was displaced in my triple, without much objection, as the steps seemed easy and I don't usually like being told "dance with these people, you have no choice in the matter", even if that means that one is assured people to dance with- maybe I'm a bit of a snob about such things, but I like when I can at least Choose when I want to dance with folks who don't know what they're doing. So there was a lot of chatting, for quite a while. But dancing eventually picked up.

Today has been minyan, a surprise visit from Steve, and some napping. I found myself pretty exhausted. Plans for the rest of the day: groceries, plan a get-together for Saturday night, do some homework, attend a talk at 7 and go dancing after that.

My Window

There was just a remarkably large crow in the tree outside my window. Really Remarkably large. And just about on eye level with me. It was a mildly unusual experience. One forgets how big crows are- this one approached chicken size.

My Window

There was just a remarkably large crow in the tree outside my window. Really Remarkably large. And just about on eye level with me. It was a mildly unusual experience. One forgets how big crows are- this one approached chicken size.

A Day For Me, and Some Other Minor Kvetching

I took a serious day for myself today. I did very little during most of the day- I spent a chunk of time napping without having to worry too much about where I needed to be right afterwards, and just hanging around. I should have done homework, but I just seriously needed some time just to be. It worked out well- I went to minyan, had a surprise breakfast visit, spent the day relaxing, and then went to a talk about Judaism in the Czech Republic and then to dancing this evening, where I think I spent nearly as much time talking with Steve as dancing.

I'm finding it both interesting and rather frustrating that I can't go to dancing and just dance and hang out anymore. Someone always has to pull the "oh, she's a rabbinical student" card, and I get questions. And I'm happy to have those conversations, but I wish I could have them without the professional hat on. I know, this is going to be my life. And some of it is that this is still a new dance community for me, and will be for a while. Once people get to know me, a bunch of the questions get answered, and don't have to be asked again. Also, then I'm a person, and not just a role, so they can just chat comfortably, hopefully. We'll see how this theory works out. But what used to be a social outlet is now only partially that. But when I have to have this very artificial conversation about how person x whom I've never met was such a great hebrew school principal, just because she was also a rabbinical student and wore a kippah, well- it's frustrating. So was the conversation last night from someone who saw me the one time I was at KOE and wanted to know why I hadn't gone back since, after he had already spoken disparagingly of the same d'var torah that folks had praised at lunch on Shabbos, and then needed me to explain that halakha isn't a monolithic thing- that there is often more than one acceptable halakhic opinion on any issue depending on origin, time period, circumstances, approach, etc, and all that visible within Orthodoxy alone... I know, that's exactly the sort of education I want to put out there. But to be almost chastized for not showing up somewhere to daven by someone who has no idea why I would or wouldn't chose to go there regularly felt unpleasant.

A Day For Me, and Some Other Minor Kvetching

I took a serious day for myself today. I did very little during most of the day- I spent a chunk of time napping without having to worry too much about where I needed to be right afterwards, and just hanging around. I should have done homework, but I just seriously needed some time just to be. It worked out well- I went to minyan, had a surprise breakfast visit, spent the day relaxing, and then went to a talk about Judaism in the Czech Republic and then to dancing this evening, where I think I spent nearly as much time talking with Steve as dancing.

I'm finding it both interesting and rather frustrating that I can't go to dancing and just dance and hang out anymore. Someone always has to pull the "oh, she's a rabbinical student" card, and I get questions. And I'm happy to have those conversations, but I wish I could have them without the professional hat on. I know, this is going to be my life. And some of it is that this is still a new dance community for me, and will be for a while. Once people get to know me, a bunch of the questions get answered, and don't have to be asked again. Also, then I'm a person, and not just a role, so they can just chat comfortably, hopefully. We'll see how this theory works out. But what used to be a social outlet is now only partially that. But when I have to have this very artificial conversation about how person x whom I've never met was such a great hebrew school principal, just because she was also a rabbinical student and wore a kippah, well- it's frustrating. So was the conversation last night from someone who saw me the one time I was at KOE and wanted to know why I hadn't gone back since, after he had already spoken disparagingly of the same d'var torah that folks had praised at lunch on Shabbos, and then needed me to explain that halakha isn't a monolithic thing- that there is often more than one acceptable halakhic opinion on any issue depending on origin, time period, circumstances, approach, etc, and all that visible within Orthodoxy alone... I know, that's exactly the sort of education I want to put out there. But to be almost chastized for not showing up somewhere to daven by someone who has no idea why I would or wouldn't chose to go there regularly felt unpleasant.